Your Role in Your Loved One’s Recovery
Breaking free of codependency
Codependency is when we try to cope with the destructive behavior of another person by controlling their behavior and actions. With the goal of helping a loved one, we take time off work, devote less attention to other members of the family and ourselves, and deplete savings. Sometimes these actions enable the destructive behaviors to continue. To help the person we love, we must stop trying to control their behaviors. Learning to let go is one of the most difficult challenges the parent of an addicted child faces. It’s an ongoing —yet liberating—process. Group members in Learn to Cope provide each other with strength and encouragement, forming a supportive community that makes it more likely for our loved ones to recover.
Behaviors Include
- Trying to control another person’s behavior and the consequences of those behaviors
- Doing for another what they are capable of doing on their own
- Making decisions that allow codependency to continue
- Neglecting your own needs and the needs of other family members
- Giving a message that says, “I don’t think you can make it on your own”
- Being more concerned with being a “good” friend than with your own well-being
- Being trapped in a destructive cycle of giving more and more while increasingly neglecting one’s own needs